The following passage contains some incredibly boring words. Could you please improve it by replacing the underlined words with something more exciting. You can rewrite the passage in your neatest St. Stephen's handwriting and then type a few of your improved sentences in the comment box so that I can see.
One nice day last summer, Katy decided to walk to the park. She said to Jenny “ Would you like to come too?”
“Oh yes please,” said Jenny.
The two friends had a good chat on the way to the park about their summer. They were both happy that the weather was so lovely. However, Katy was sad that her little sister had been taken to the farm as a special treat. She had been naughty and Mum was cross with her.
“Don’t be upset and spoil today though,” said Jenny.
When they got to the park, the girls were happy to find that they had the playground to themselves. They walked to the swings and started to play. After a while, Katy said that they should go and buy some lollies. They were nice. When they had finished, the girls walked home.
You might need tweak the sentence so that your word choice makes sense and take care with a and an
Comments
Amelia Mae
18 May 2020
Here is the list of words and what we changed them to;
nice-wonderful
said-asked
said-replied
good-interesting
happy-delighted
lovely-sunny
sad-upset
little-smaller
naughty-misbehaving
cross-angry
upset-feeling down
got to-reacted
happy-delighted
walked-trotted
said-asked
nice-sweet
walked-skipped
I am writing this up in neat now. From Amelia
Lyndon Dean-Boardman
18 May 2020
I found it a bit tricky Mum had to help me choose some words. This is one of my sentences.
Katy suggested that they should go and buy some lollies.
Miss Kinsey
18 May 2020
Hi Amelia,
Wow! You have been busy! Your suggestions are a lot better than the original passage. Well done :)
Miss Kinsey
18 May 2020
Hi Lyndon!
It was a good work out for your brain. Suggested is a fabulous alternative. Well done :)
Benjamin
18 May 2020
Hi Miss Kinsey
Benjy enjoyed this work! His little brain was working over time! Here are some words Benjamin chose: hottest, delicious, shouted, questioned! So one of his sentences was Katy shouted shall we go and get some ice creams!
Miss Kinsey
18 May 2020
Hi Benjamin and Mrs King!
I am really glad that you enjoyed this activity, Benjamin. Giving our brain a good work out is a very good thing to do indeed.
'Shouted' is a brilliant word to use and a lot better than 'said'
There is a poem called 'Don't Say Said' which is magnificent. If you copy and paste this address into your browser you will be able to read it:
http://www.primaryresources.co.uk/english/pdfs/3said.pdf